Dear The Sun,
I know you light and heat the earth and without you we wouldn't have lots of cool things like solar power, sweet corn and existance, but you are such a fucking bully. Sure, you see to it that the world isn't a freezing death hole, and you played a big part in life, you know, doing so good. Kudos, really, I appriciate it. Thanks. But the madness must stop here. What kind of powerful life provider are you? The one that deals out sunburn and skin cancer? People desire for your tan-giving rays, and you hand it over like a gumball despenser giving gumballs. But you are a crazed serial killer handing out poison candy to the naive holloween children. Now nobody can Trick-or-Treat anymore. Asshole.
Alright, I admit, I am a little mad, you do give me hives, which I gotta tell you, having sunburn is bad, but if it itches too? What a tastey treat! And I swear up and down you are the source of some of my migranes. It might not be true, childhood associations blah blah blah, but think of what else you do to others! Solar flares, interfering with various radio waves, your eclipses blinding children? Seriously dude, what kind of ego do you have that nobody can look at you without punishment? Are you some bizzare cosmic dictator? It adds up? Unreasonable and tyranical punishments to your subjects, threatening nuclear power, brainwashing all of your subjects to think youre freaking sweet despite evidence against the claim! Kim Jung Sun! Stalsun! Sun pot! I am calling you out on this!
I drew this picture for you, the lighting accidently works out
Another day under the sun's facist regime? I'D RATHER BE DEAD!